Couples often look forward to the Golden Years, when money and leisure will be more plentiful and responsibilities less. However, having a husband hard of hearing can ruin the program if both partners aren't informed of the possibility of such impairment and of the challenges it may present. About half of senior marriages will encounter this problem.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
Another problem, and one not so easily solved, is that what goes first for many men is high-pitched sounds. This means they have difficulty hearing their wives, daughters, and grandchildren speak. A wife may lose the ability to converse happily in the car, to talk from another room, or to have boisterous family gatherings with everyone milling around together. Fathers become increasingly shut out of general conversations.
Husbands also may react badly to being shouted at, which a lot of wives find themselves doing. It's hard to sound dulcet and winsome at the top of your voice, and shouting also may cause a more severe expression than you intend. Counselors familiar with this conflict suggest looking directly at your man and speaking slowly and clearly rather than at very loud volume. This, unfortunately, requires more effort, and many women, experiencing the fatigue that often accompanies the 'golden years', may resent this.
Of course, if we can be objective, messing up a long-term relationship because of a physical problem is a real waste. There are solutions, like battery-powered aids, that can minimize the problem. These little devices are like false teeth - not as good as the original - so many men resist them or fail to get the full benefit of them by repeated fittings and adjustments.
There is also surgery, which once used to be performed mostly on children with a lifetime of impairment before them but is now not unusual among seniors. It's really worth investigating what can be done to help your spouse hear things like the grandchildren, general conversations when the family gets together, voices on the phone, and sermons in church.
Getting informed before the problem exists or becomes severe may make it easier to handle. Experts say that being blind is less isolating than being deaf. Any circulation problems, such as those caused by high blood pressure, diabetes, or heart disease, can affect the ears. It's important to learn how to protect your ears and what can be done to keep your ability to hear longer.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
Another problem, and one not so easily solved, is that what goes first for many men is high-pitched sounds. This means they have difficulty hearing their wives, daughters, and grandchildren speak. A wife may lose the ability to converse happily in the car, to talk from another room, or to have boisterous family gatherings with everyone milling around together. Fathers become increasingly shut out of general conversations.
Husbands also may react badly to being shouted at, which a lot of wives find themselves doing. It's hard to sound dulcet and winsome at the top of your voice, and shouting also may cause a more severe expression than you intend. Counselors familiar with this conflict suggest looking directly at your man and speaking slowly and clearly rather than at very loud volume. This, unfortunately, requires more effort, and many women, experiencing the fatigue that often accompanies the 'golden years', may resent this.
Of course, if we can be objective, messing up a long-term relationship because of a physical problem is a real waste. There are solutions, like battery-powered aids, that can minimize the problem. These little devices are like false teeth - not as good as the original - so many men resist them or fail to get the full benefit of them by repeated fittings and adjustments.
There is also surgery, which once used to be performed mostly on children with a lifetime of impairment before them but is now not unusual among seniors. It's really worth investigating what can be done to help your spouse hear things like the grandchildren, general conversations when the family gets together, voices on the phone, and sermons in church.
Getting informed before the problem exists or becomes severe may make it easier to handle. Experts say that being blind is less isolating than being deaf. Any circulation problems, such as those caused by high blood pressure, diabetes, or heart disease, can affect the ears. It's important to learn how to protect your ears and what can be done to keep your ability to hear longer.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
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